God is moving right now. In fact he always is. But let me more specific, he is moving me. I'm processing what each step looks like, and thru out it all, I've truly recognized his grace in him making me more like him. I'll be super honest, I keep telling God I'm tracking, out of my commitment to follow. But I'm at a lose for words, I don't see what He's doing here. There are so many emotions to look beyond, and to really see what response I give when I'm completely empty handed. In our lives, there is a lot we can control, but its at those moments when we loose control that we are emotional wrecks, we find confusion, and we respond to our uneasy circumstances. But at what point will I really praise God and be completely content when things are difficult or even the way we think it should not be. I'm guilty of not being content often. So here I am, and I don't know what is next, I know what I've prayed for to be next, and I know I want to be fully engaged in student ministry. Although I am at a place where I have no more control, I'm completely reliant on God's provision. And yes it's a scary place to be because I want to know whats next, I want to know that I'm being all I can be in Christ. I say that when we make decisions it's not spinning the world and seeing where our finger stops like when we were kids, or like playing mash. But it's taking our experiences, passions,& where God is working in turn to walk towards that. I'm recognizing so much about me in regards to being so empty handed, and I understand more what it means for God to take it all. I hope this encourages you. I hope this answers questions about where I'm at. I am so thankful for those who have prayed for me, and encouraged me along the way. One step I know I am taking is obtaining my masters degree in human services, specified with marriage and family. Why? I love students, namely girls, and alongside of that goes ministry with their parents, helping equip them to encourage their teenagers to develop their own relationship with Jesus. I especially have a place in my heart for single moms/parents and teenager relationship, because that was part of my story. Whether a troubled teenager or a fully equipped teenager, everyone of us have a need. Alot of our decisions& reactions come from our relationships or lack of with our parents/guardians. So to God be glory in all of this. I'm truly breathing his grace!!
Col 1:26-27!!
Ash

Pride weekend and thoughts.

this may make some of you annoyed, mad, or whatever, but it is what it is.

Let me say, the world knows everything we are against, but when they wonder what we love do they know what to say? Do they feel the love personally at all.
I'm going to address the dilemma in my head. I love people. I know we are all created by God and for God. (Col 2 and Ps 139). This is all I have to offer on my view of homosexuality. One, the rainbow was a symbol of God's promise with his people, society has acceptably brought it to represent the diversity in the lesbian, gay, transgender community. Two, pride is one thing God hates, its interesting that's what they call their festivals. 3, Romans 1 is clear about the unnatural relations (the bible is clear men with men and women with women) the people were sinfully indulging in.
So now that I stated that, let me say a person who follows Jesus should be expected to follow Jesus, and a person who does not follow Jesus, should not be expected to follow Jesus. We can't get angry, irritated, etc with the world who acts like the world. Also, sometimes in the midst of a cause we see the passion of the cause and we forget real people and their hearts are behind these causes, and that's what we need to care for, their hearts, their spirits destination, and see them as God sees them, because the truth is that his love is applicable to all people no matter their condition, just as it is applicable to you.
We form our own pride against those we feel are sinning. Whatever the sin. We all have our own bents, and sin.
The solution: listen to people, hear their story( their is a reason), share the Gospel with out being ashamed, and love as Jesus thoroughly loves you,

and I end with my lyrics from a recent song...
"But you know and you love me still,
you see everything and you remain.
you see all of me, ashamed of or proud of,
you see every thought and you're still here."

his love remains for us all!

What is Holy?

I feel sometimes I miss the meanings of words. Or I know them but I miss the fullness of them. If I don't take the fullness of the word then I guess I'm not really defining it. So what does that matter well I was contemplating Holy.
What is holy?

I've been asking God what holy looks like. Because as I explore that he is holy God, it seems he is characterized that not only in the purity realm but also in the way he loves me, in the way he creates things, holy in the way that he exists, holy in every attribute.

So the idea that holy is adverb. It's more than an adjective describing one realm. If it is, then how do I respond to people likewise?
If with holiness I were to love someone then I would therefore love them beyond myself, and there it would be completely selfless

If with holiness I act, then I would then consider my actions not by my own interest, but rather by need of someone else

If with holiness I enter whatever I do, then I step aside I am no longer responding to my desires but I'm existing like my father.

If holiness in how I see myself, then I no longer see circumstances I begin see life as opportunity, secondly I no longer compare myself for lacking or in pride, rather I solely compare myself with Jesus.

Just a thought. I think I could read this everyday and never have attained this, but I pray I can to some degree a little more everyday.

Love remains... through it all

You know Ive been really thinking about love lately.. and not like in any way that I want love but in a way that I need to love better. So where else to turn but to scripture where the love manifest itself the most. Deny what you want but if Jesus died on the cross, as we know historically to be true, we can sense that he didn't die for himself, but for love. Love for his Father, to complete his life in full obedience as well as understanding and sharing of the love of the Father. So I recall the love of Jesus to the church to withstand punishment, name calling, torture, bad reputation, among other things, and also treated as a criminal resulting in dying. Also I turn to 1 Cor 13... and as you begin to read, you realize Paul's challenge, that nothing is worthwhile with out the love. The thing as of late that catches me the most is the part that says perseveres. Love perseveres. That's powerful, because that means love exists beyond being loved back, actually love exists even when hate is what is given.Love trumps all things. We can apply that to lots of areas in our life. Job, ministry, family, responsibilities, people to people encounters. But for me the place in sticks out the most is at the point of relating to people.
So take that persevering love and apply that to the people you are to love and serve and they turn away from your love. Or they say its too hard, or I've been hurt before. Love moves past that. As a girl that means that I can perceive those little things, and feelings that other people might feel and adjust my actions to meet the in between lines that a normal basis maybe no one even pays attention to, like a piece of trash on the ground or a lady feeding her son, and can't get up for a napkin or a drink. Also for the girl I'd say move past what feels safe and good, and remember that love not only persevers but also hopes and trusts. Ladies, know how to protect that heart, but not let the protecting hold you back from giving love. For guys I'd discernably say, be a warrior fight for what you love. Pray that God give you vision and a warrior heart to capture what you want, what you know is right. No matter what obstacles there maybe, Jesus suffered much and death to examplify his love to His Father and to His Bride.

Call me a hopeless romantic but Love will always stand. It doesn't fade. because true love is defined in 1 Cor 13, and if you are offering that love it'll last forever, it'll outlast your life. We give up all to easily. We fade on commitment because we hold on to our selfish hearts. Let us love with the greatest love ever, with the one who created love to be and to last.